do you ever feel like a plastic bag.?

seriously..
im sad..so sad..
things aren't smooth as it should be..
haiz..
i wanna cry..
T.T
firstly,my left eye swelling..and it hurt like hell..
very uncomfortable..cant even close my eye..
keep watery and itchy..
wat should i do..?
secondly,my result..
i noe it will be bad but never thought would be this bad..
haiz..
the blame is on me..always play,play and play..
third..
i wan something that never be mine..
i noe it from the start but keep forcing..
at the end..i hurt myself..
its really hurt..
people always said rainbow will appear after the rain..
will there be a rainbow for me..?